Tamar: Before He Was King

  Tamar: Before He Was King

  A Short Story

  By Shan

  This story is meant to give a little insight on Tamar’s character before he became the man whom he is today. If you don’t know whom I am speaking of, then please do check out the Rozalyn series by me.

  1:BRANDON

  Sweat poured down my forehead and I quickly wiped it away before anyone could see it. My hands were trembling and my stomach was rumbling causing me to feel like I would shit myself at any moment. The tears that threatened to fall from my eyes, I fought to keep from falling. I could see him staring holes into me as he watched the pistol I had trained on him.

  He, Jeremiah McCall, was the same age as me, a little shorter, but bigger. The nigga had bigger hands than me and he proved just how big every time he beat my ass. I hated this nigga. Ever since I stepped on his brand new Adidas back in seventh grade, he’d been making my life a living hell. He was always teasing me and always fucking with me every time he spotted me running down the halls.

  The shit wasn’t that serious to me, but I guess since he knew he could beat my ass, he kept picking on me. I ain’t never see him do nobody else the way he did me. I wasn’t no punk. It was just Jeremiah that I couldn’t seem to beat. I was scared of him and I could tell that he knew even though I was the one holding the gun, that I was still scared of him. I didn’t see not one look of fear in his eyes—the fear that I knew was in mine.

  BLAM!

  I could feel a trickle of urine run down my legs as the basement door swung open and footsteps pounded against the weakened stairs. It was Tahj. Those tears fell and there was nothing I could do stop them. I wanted to kill Jeremiah, but I just couldn’t. I didn’t have it in me to take someone’s life. I was only fourteen years old.

  “B, Tahj will be back in a minute! He went to the liquor store. You still ain’t did this shit?” Tamar asked me.

  He was out of breath as he leaned over and looked down at Jeremiah whom was tied to one of the brick-like poles that held up the bottom of the house. Tahj found out what Jeremiah had been doing to me, snatched him off the streets, and brought him here. He handed me a pistol that I didn’t know how to use, but today was the day that I had to learn.

  I didn’t have any other choice. I was sentenced to the basement until I handled Jeremiah. It'd been almost six hours since I’d been here and I still hadn’t built up the courage to do it.

  Tamar looked over at the urine stain in my torn jeans and rushed over toward me. He lips curled up in anger and disgust and he snatched the gun away from my hands. I was terrified and Tamar could see it, just as Jeremiah could. I watched as Tamar turned the gun on Jeremiah, his eyes suddenly lit up with horror. Without even blinking, second guessing, or saying a damn word, Tamar pulled the trigger; putting a hollow point into Jeremiah’s young head. My heart pounded against my thin-framed chest and my body heated up.

  “Here nigga,” Tamar said handing the gun back to me. “I gotta go back to bed before Tahj gets back. Just tell him you did it, okay?” Tamar took off running back up the basement stairs and shut the door behind him. I stood there with the gun focused on Jeremiah’s lifeless body in case he wasn’t actually dead.

  But I knew he was no longer alive. The blood that seeped through the tiny hole in his head was thick and dark red. I wanted to vomit, but I held it in. I had to keep it together because I knew Tahj would be back at any minute.

  It seemed like another hour had gone by before Tahj finally came down the basement stairs. My arm was heavy from holding the steel out and the smell of my own piss was making me sick. I looked up at him and the biggest smile I’d ever seen before appeared on his face.

  “My nigga,” Tahj said as he chuckled with joy. He looked down at Jeremiah’s body and laughed. He walked over to the young boy and knelt down in front of him. I watched him from the back as he nodded his head and then stood to his feet. He came over to me and took the gun out of my hands, rubbing his hands through my curly hair. He took his finger, placed it under my chin, and then forced me to look up at him. “Congratulations on becoming a man.”

  “Thank you, sir,” I said unsure of what else to say. Although I hadn’t done a damn thing, I knew I couldn’t tell him that I didn’t. He would probably beat Tamar and then me if he found out.

  “Now, go up there and tell the twins to come clean this shit up. You did good. You made me proud.”

  I nodded my head and quickly ran up the stairs. I ran to Taron and Tavon’s room and pushed the door open, “Tahj said come to the basement and clean it up.”

  “Damn B, knock before you come in!” Taron yelled and tossed a shirt at me. I didn’t even care about the girl that was bent over across the bed with Taron’s dick in her. I quickly shut the door and raced to the bathroom where I finally let it all out.

  Everything that I’d eaten for breakfast that morning came rushing out into the toilet. I coughed and washed my face with a towel before going into the bedroom I shared with Tamar and Keylan.

  Keylan was asleep on the top bunk while Tamar was in his bed that was closest to the wall. I walked over to the dresser to grab me a pair of clean underwear and some pants to put on and was about to shower when I heard Tamar steering around his bed. I turned to look at him and could see the white of his eyes in the dark room.

  “Thank you, Tae,” I told him.

  “You my nigga, B. We boys for life. I’ll have your back and you’ll have mine.”

  I nodded my head and walked out of the room headed back into the bathroom. Sometimes I hated living in this house because of Tahj, but when I thought about the friend I had in Tamar and Keylan—and having a mama in Cheryl that I never had before, I was thankful and wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

  2: TAMAR

  Months later….

  That night I killed Jeremiah ignited something in me because I felt nothing at all. I put that bullet in him like it was nothing and I felt good doing so. I had expected to be sick or to have nightmares about that shit, but I didn't.

  I slept perfectly fine knowing that I'd taken a life and I woke up the next day feeling something that maybe a thirteen year old probably should never feel until they were old enough to know what to do with it.

  I felt power; like I had all the power in the world. After pulling that trigger, I knew that no one would ever be able to fuck with me again because I knew that if I had to I would kill again—and again—and again. It was nothing.

  "Dad stop! Stop hitting her!" I could hear the twins yelling from my parent's bedroom. I rushed to the closet, pulled the door open, and went for the orange Nike box that was tucked in the corner.

  I hurried and pulled everything from the top of it, opened the box, and pulled out the .38 that was inside. I checked to make sure it was loaded before I ran out of the closet and back into the living room where everyone was watching my pops beat the fuck out of my moms.

  "Daddy, you're gonna kill her," Tavon cried helplessly as he watched on from the corner of the room.

  "Please stop daddy!" Taron wailed.

  I raised the gun and pointed it at my pops as he continued to pound on my mom's skull, practically beating her to death. Out the corner of my eye, I could see the twins staring at me with indecision. One of them niggas should have been the one behind the gun, but instead they chose to cower down to our father. Nah, not me. I wasn't scared of him. I would kill him. I was going to kill him.

  "Get your hands off my mama!" I yelled with the gun now pointed at my pop's head.

  I had enough of him hitting on my mama like she was some dog. This had been going ever since I was born, and I was so fuckin' tired of seeing my moms being treated this way. She was a good woman and she didn't deserve it.


  Tahj laughed as he looked at me with glossy eyes. He placed his hand over his stomach and kneeled over with laughter. I maintained my aim and kept it pointed at him. My hand was firm and my finger was right over the trigger.

  One wrong move and I was bodying this nigga. Father or not, if he didn't get his hands off of her, I was gonna let loose on his ass and I meant that shit.

  "You ain't gonna do shit! Now put that fuckin' gun back where you got it from before I beat your ass!" Tahj yelled at me. His voice was so loud that it caused a cold chill to run down my spine.

  "Get away from her! Now!" I yelled even louder than he had.

  "Or what?'

  POW! POW! POW!

  Everything in the room seemed to go still. No one moved. Not another cry was heard and not another tear fell. We all watched as my pops, Tahj jerked back and fell to the ground. His eyes grew big as he gripped his hand over the hole that had penetrated through his chest. The other two bullets missed him and were in the wall behind him. Fuck! I walked closer to him, ready to finish him off.

  "Tae no!" Taron yelled out.

  "Y'all just gonna sit here and let him kill our mama! I'm sick of this nigga! I'm gonna kill him!"

  Suddenly, Taron jumped on me and knocked me to the ground. The gun fell out of my hand and slid across the floor. Taron pinned my hands down to the floor and looked over at Brandon and Keylan.

  "One of y'all call an ambulance. Hurry up before they both die!"

  "Get off of me! Get off of me!" I roared.

  I tried to fight Taron off, but he was much bigger than me. I couldn't believe he had the balls to try and hold me down--to fight me when the one he should have been fighting was our father.

  "Get the fuck off of me Ron! I'm a kill his ass!"

  "I think you already did, Tae! He's not moving! Calm down!" Taron yelled.

  His eyes were red from all the crying he'd been doing. He looked down at me and I could see the fear and pain that he held, but not only did I see fear and pain; I saw relief. I saw him silently thanking me for what I had done.

  He probably would never admit it verbally, but I could tell that he was relieved that we no longer had to worry about our pops ever putting his hands on our moms again.

  ***

  3 Years later.....

  "Yo', you need to calm the fuck down! If I wanted to be with that young ass bitch, then I would be with her. Why the fuck you tripping over some bitch that's still in high school?" I yelled as I pulled my coat on. I grabbed my hat from the dresser and placed it onto my head.

  "Because everybody around the way talking about they seen the two of you going into your house together!" Shalea yelled.

  She was getting on my damn nerves. Part of the reason, I liked my women older was because I didn't want to have to deal with bullshit like this. All that nagging, crying, and insecure mess got on my fuckin' nerves. Shalea and I been together a damn year already and I swear at least six months out of that year she'd accused me of cheating on her.

  "Now, you know that got to be a muthafuckin' lie! I don't bring bitches to my granny's house like that and you know that shit."

  "Well, why the hell are people saying they seen you with her, Tae?"

  "I don't know Shalea and I don't give a fuck! Look, I gotta go. Von is outside waiting on me. They had to rush my granny to the hospital."

  "When are we gonna talk about this, Tae?"

  "Are you serious? My fuckin' granny has been rushed to the hospital and you still wanna talk about this bullshit. You know what, fuck you Shalea. I'm done!"

  I walked out of the bedroom only to be pulled back by Shalea. She rushed to jump in front of me so that I could not walk out of the door. She was pissing me the fuck off. My granny had been dealing with a whole lot of health problems over the last year or so and shit seemed to be getting worse by the day.

  Her and my grandfather both seemed to become sick when Taron was pulled out of their home and tossed in prison for a murder he claims he never committed. Ever since that incident their health had seemed to spiral out of control, and fast. My grandfather died in a hospital bed a little over a year after Taron was locked up.

  And since then my granny had been fighting with this lawsuit against the hospital for wrongful death of my grandfather and battling her own problems. Shit was fucked up; especially since my grandmother was the closest thing I had to a mother right now.

  She had six boys that looked up to her dearly and would’ve done anything in this world for her. I just prayed that nothing happened to her and that she pulled through this shit just fine. Without her, we wouldn’t have anybody left to look up to. Her and my grandfather were it. They were the last hope we had and without them, I knew were all headed for mayhem.

  My moms was doing pretty cool. Although my father damn near beat her to death that night, she was still alive. She wasn’t quite right in the head after being in a coma for a good minute. She woke up looking for my pops, wanting to be with him and wondering why he wasn’t there for her when she finally opened her eyes.

  My granny told us that she was just out of her mind and wasn't thinking clearly at the time. I didn't really give a fuck why she wanted that nigga, but I ain't want shit to do with her until she got her shit straight.

  The fuck she put me through damn near killing that nigga and six months in juvie for her to wake up and ask for that nigga? I thought to myself.

  With all that's going on with my granny though, I didn't have time for this shit with Shalea. She was becoming too clingy for me. Another reason why I thought fucking with an older chick was best for me was because I thought them hoes didn't mind being alone every now and then. I had too much shit to do to be laid up under a bitch all damn day. Fuck is wrong with this bitch?

  "I said I was done! Get the fuck off of me!" I yelled as I stared at Shalea with contempt.

  Tears rolled down her face and I brought my hands up to wipe them away. Her eyes were red and her brown cheeks were puffy as they always were when she was upset. She was being all dramatic and shit as usual. Shit was getting old with me and she continuously wondered why I stepped out on her ass.

  "Don't leave like this Tae! We need to talk about this! I'm sorry for accusing you, but I was just letting you know what I heard," Shalea whined. "I'm sorry, Tae. I don't want to lose you over this. Please, don't leave on the note of us not being together. Just check on your grandmother and call me in the morning, okay?"

  I only nodded and stepped away from Shalea. She stepped into my space again, got on the tips of toes, and kissed me on the cheek.

  "I love you, baby. You know this."

  "A'ight Shalea. Let me go, I gotta get to my granny," I told her and then stepped around her to leave. I rushed to my brother's car and hurried and hopped inside the passenger's seat. "What's up bruh? You hear anything?"

  "Nah, B said they were trying to get her blood pressure down and that was all they told him," Tavon said as he pulled away from Shalea's house.

  "Damn, man. I hope she gonna be a'ight. Not trying to lose her right now."

  "Hell yea, she gotta be okay. She the strength of this fuckin' family and we need her. Lose her and everything is gonna fall apart. I can feel it."

  "I wonder what happened. When I left this morning, she said she was feeling fine. She ain't been sick all week."

  "I don't know. She told me she got the call from the lawyer that the hospital settled on the suit she had against them. She was happy and doing good when I last talked to her too. Don't know what the fuck happened."

  "That's what's up. Glad they finally settled so she don't have to be stressing about that. Maybe now, she'll be able to relax and get better."

  "For real."

  Tavon reached over and turned the volume up on the stereo and I leaned back in my seat thinking about my life. I'd been out here getting my money up to be a young nigga, but the lil' bit I was getting wasn't enough to suppress my appetite.

  Running behind my brother and cousins wasn't going to cut it for
me. They wasn't taking me to the big money and there was no way I was gonna keep eating like this. I had to step my game up and I knew just who I needed to see in order to do it.

  3: Tamar

  A couple of weeks had passed by since my grandmother was rushed to the hospital. She was admitted and the doctors treated her status as critical up until the day she passed away. I don't think I'd ever felt so fucked up in my entire life.

  My granny was a sweet person and she was always looking out for somebody. Lately she had been looking after me, my brothers, B, Key and Roderick until my mom got back on her feet—if she ever did.

  This was a loss that none of us had been expecting. It seemed that my grandfather's death was too fresh and now here we were dealing with the passing of another angel. Her death made me angry. My granny had been the only one that I could really talk to when times seemed to get a little too tough for me, especially when shit used to get rough between me and my pops.

  She used to always be the one telling me she loved me and that I was special no matter how many times my pops tried to demean and make feel less than. She kept me from going insane and without her; I knew I would never be the same. She was the wisdom that I needed in my life.

  She always had some slick shit to say whenever I was off my square and fucking up and she damn sure didn't mind squaring up with a nigga when I thought I was too tough to mind her. I had to laugh at that shit. My granny was only like 5'3 and didn't weigh too much more than a hundred pounds, but she would swear up and down that she would body slam any of us when we got out of line.

  Granny was gangsta, lived in the same house since she'd been in her early twenties, and was pretty much known as the queen of the neighborhood. Everybody knew not to fuck with my granny, knowing that she would fire her .22 with ease, and not only that, they knew she had six head bustas ready to pounce on they ass if they ever tried her. She ain't play no games and neither did we.